My alternative sexiest men alive list

Disclaimer: I appreciate that this particular post may only be interesting to those readers of a certain inclination. I promise to return to more generally appealing subject matter next week 😉

Ryan Gosling – robbed!

So on Wednesday Channing Tatum was announced as People Magazine’s 2012 Sexiest Man Alive. People Magazine has become somewhat of the gold standard in terms of Sexiest Man Alive lists, and it has been suggested in the past that some serious campaigning goes into getting the title. Previous winners include Bradley Cooper, Matt Damon and George Clooney. Tatum was this year’s winner based no doubt on his outing in Magic Mike – where he played a stripper, and a good one at that. There is no doubting his credentials, and he is establishing himself as not just a body, but a decent actor at that. But, and it is a Caps Lock Bold BUT, I would suggest there are more worthy winners. Because I can, I put to you my list of 2012’s Sexiest Men Alive (according to Jess).

Number 5: Richard Kahui:  Unlikely to ever make People’s list, though I would suggest he would if he were an NFL player, Kahui appeared on many ‘sexiest players’ lists during the Rugby World Cup. Incredibly fit, with a smile that most Colgate models would envy, he adds to his already long list of appealing qualities by being an incredibly nice guy. Evidence: after the World Cup final he was doing an interview and the reporter queried why he was taking his boots off. His answer? He was going to find some kid in the crowd to give them to. Aw shucks. He makes it over the try line with flying colours.

Number 4: Joseph Gordon-Levitt: Joe has come a long way since playing the geeky kid in Third Rock from the Sun and Ten Things I Hate about You, and 2012 has been a particularly big year for him. He played a pivotal role in The Dark Knight Rises, established his action credentials as a young Bruce Willis in Looper, and (for kiwi audiences this year at least) harnessed his dramatic side as a cancer victim in 50/50. And in all of those roles he was thoroughly convincing. Not satisfied with just acting though, he also established his own open collaborative production company hitRECord, and has a series of sell out shows organised throughout the States in the coming weeks. It is that entreprenuerial spirit, plus the dimples and that slightly mischievous twinkle in the eye, that propel him onto my list.

Number Three: Ben Whishaw: So, many years ago my friends decided that I had a definite ‘type’ when it came to guys – ‘skinny, geeky, weedy’. Well, Ben Whishaw is the pure definition of this. I would like to add something my friends omitted though – which is intelligence. I can’t speak for the man himself, having never met him and not watched enough interview footage, but he can definitely PLAY intelligent. His starring role as dedicated and somewhat socially inept reporter Freddie Lyon in brilliant BBC drama The Hour catapulted him onto my list, and appearances in The Hollow Crown and Bright Star cemented his place. He has a certain kind of appealing Englishness, and seems like the type who would write lovely poetry (or maybe it was his playing Keats that makes me think that…). Not for everyone, but I will be watching out for him as Q, not Daniel Craig as Bond, in Skyfall.

Number Two: Tom Hiddleston: This was SUCH a tough call, with my number 1 and 2 duking it out until the bitter end. Something tells me next year’s list might be different…but let’s see. Some of you may be asking, Tom who? And when I say, Loki from The Avengers, you will say, really? Yes, really. And this sartorially talented and incredibly articulate Brit got my attention in a slightly random way – not through one of his characters, but through interviews I watched him do (like this one). He in person is FAR more appealing than any of the characters he has played so far, though him as Henry IV in The Hollow Crown was…something special. But his energy, intellect and charm shine through in every interview I have seen him do – which is a special kind of talent. And really, anyone who can get away with saying the words ‘mewling quim’ in a blockbuster movie deserves all kinds of plaudits. Big things ahead for you Tom, of that I am certain (Bond you say? You heard it here first!).

Number One: Ryan Gosling: Ryan, what can I say. You were robbed! Last year by the thoroughly undeserving (and always in need of a shave) Bradley Cooper and this year by Channing. As my friend Hannah pointed out, you did everything possible to secure the prize last year. You played a buff and charming womaniser in Crazy Stupid Love. You played an intense but vulnerable stunt driver/accidental criminal in Drive (for which you got critical acclaim). You even broke up a street fight (in real life, people!) in New York. You did it all. And what did People give you? Nothing! Well, I give you MY award for Sexiest Man Alive (which you are welcome to redeem at any time – it is a bar of chocolate though, and I can’t be sure it will be here long…). You caught my attention and broke my heart years ago in The Notebook and have had it ever since. Special mention goes to your acceptance of the ‘Best Kiss’ MTV award all those years ago. But, bring on Gangster Squad and your 2013 People Magazine crown is all I can say. Or I will be one of the people protesting outside their offices (#thatactuallyhappened).

So, that was my list! Feel free to comment and add your own!

Tom Hiddleston – watch out…

(This list wasn’t easy to compile, I can tell you. Honourable mention has to go to the perennial favourites George Clooney and Matt Damon, small screen stars Adam Scott (Parks and Recreation) and Kit Harington (Game of Thrones – who gets extra points for being named after Knight Rider’s car and STILL being hot) and on-the-list-despite-being-Australian Chris Hemsworth.)


2 thoughts on “My alternative sexiest men alive list

  1. You are so lucky that we came to the conclusion that different tastes in men equals no fighting over who gets the guy… If not, this could have been a friendship-ending blog post.
    Now, the real top 5 is:
    1. Channing (oh how People got it right)
    2. Johnny Depp – the fact that he didn’t even get an honourable mention from you is disappointing to say the least!
    3. Chris H – hmmm clearly this one could leave us in a bit of a pickle. Lucky for me I’ve got a great right hook 🙂
    4. Ryan – the REAL Ryan. I.e. Reynolds
    5. Leo. You’re right, his glory days of Romeo and Juliet saw him in his prime, but he’s still pretty damn hot for an oldie!!!

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